I grew up with an uncle that was quadriplegic, I didn’t realize it at the time, but it permanently changed the way I view disabilities. Disabilities themselves were never the defining point of an individual. A perception that I discovered, wasn’t the norm, when researching my book “My Friend Kiara”.
I interviewed many people with different types of disabilities. I was looking to understand the biggest issues and the commonalities. I also spoke to teachers, parents, medical technology providers, and care-givers that work with children with disabilities. Yes, that’s right. Children’s picture books require lots of research! As I met more people, I realized that every person’s experience with disability was different. Even the “same” disability, could be a considerably different lived experience from one person to another. There were a couple of common elements that stood out though:
Capability and Disability aren’t related
Even with severe physical impairments, many people could perform all their normal day to day activities without assistance. Yet friends and family would routinely assume that they could not, or should not, do many things. This isn’t unusual, according to the British Social Attitudes Survey, nearly 40% of people think of disabled people as less capable.
For children with disabilities to enjoy their full potential, this is a perception that urgently needs to change. Studies have found that a child’s perceptions of their competence is the best predictor of actual achievement. (Phillips & Zimmerman, 1990). Changing adult societal perceptions, will in turn change what children with disabilities believe they are capable of.
How other people approach disabilities matters (A lot)
The reality is that most people feel uncomfortable talking to a person with disabilities (67% according to research https://www.scope.org.uk/media/press-releases/brits-feel-uncomfortable-with-disabled-people/ ). So much so that many people actually avoid speaking to disabled people! This includes people who had acquired disabilities, whose friends subsequently felt awkward engaging with them.
A lot depends upon the support (or lack of support) from people they interact with. With many daily activities, such as grocery shopping, staff attitudes are a key factor affecting disabled people’s experiences (DWP, 2002). Would you accept being banned from a store because you couldn’t pack fast enough?
Changing how we engage with and support people with disabilities isn’t difficult, it’s about changing the small things that we do all the time. For instance, introducing people the way you would anyone else, without mentioning their disability. Looking at people with disabilities in the eyes, talking to them – not the person assisting them. Offering to help, but not assuming they want it.
Provide more exposure & education on disabilities (TLDR)
It’s imperative that societal perception of & engagement with people with disabilities improves. The best way is through exposure, education (teaching kids about disabilities) and of course legal changes to protect and enforce basic rights. Providing respect, autonomy and inclusion is no more than what is asked for by the UN Convention of rights for persons with disabilities (CRPD).
